Who Do the Cornish Think They Are?

With the recent Sun article getting some all hot and bothered about us pesky Cornish, I thought I’d stick up a tiny proportion of the ignorant/ill-informed/mis-informed/half-baked drivel, general weirdness and abuse levelled at us on newspaper sites, Youtube, Wikipedia and fora across the last few years. (All typos, randomness and piss-poor grammar are as written):

Daily Mail

“I live in Cornwall and worked here for most of the last 35 years. (Well someones got to live and work here !!!)
PLEASE ignore these idiotic ideas. We have about 6 people who wear St Piran type g-strings, see through shirts and try to talk in Cornish. You can learn Cornish by popping down your local, drinking 15 pints, and try and hold a conversation with a stuffed parrot.
IF you pop down, and you are most welcome, keep off the moors between 3.00am and 5.00am as you may see some men wearing sheets dancing round a granite block shouting about a sheep.”
This is Cornwall

“Its a well known fact that most people born in Cornwall County are a bit inbred and are likely to grow up claiming the dole or sick money from the English. I holiday down there and my money supports these thickos.
England is THE Country and County Cornwall a holiday part of it. The Cornwallese are there to serve and clean up after those of us who go there and spend our money to keep them in their hovels. This year I am going to come down with the biggest England George flags just to help them remember that they are part of England and should be grateful for it. Its time for the English to unite and remind the Jocks, Taffs, immigrants and anyone else that it is our English Pound Notes that feeds them. England will arise and then watch out ! Our great Football Team is just the start. Warming up now but the boys will winthrough for us ! Remember people of Cornwall its our money – Bank of England – our noble flag St George of England and our Army which you want to thank.”    

“i have to live amongst the inbred filth. i have to work along side the inbred filth. i have to talk to the inbred filth. i take the piss out of them and they throw their dollies out of the pram. they are unable to have a conversation without pasties being mentioned. they bring their mums in to show off the love bites. They think jethro is funny. They make up history to suit themselves. They rename birds to make thei tawdry lives more important. They complain about lithuanians not being able to speak english but cant themselves Robert Baillie 26/04/11″ Facebook

“the cornish have no pride unless there’s something in it for them” Facebook 

“until you’ve put up with what i’ve had to put up with today you cannot ever accept that shit can be piled that high. single celled amoeba are more interesting. i am not violent but i really want to seriously hurt the inbred filth. Robert Baillie 27/04/11” Facebook

“I don’t give a damn about the constitutional status of Cornwall, it could become “Independent” tomorrow and I wouldn’t raise an eye-lid, but it’s not acceptable to push a POV on this encyclopaedia like that. There are rules here, things have to be sourced, factual balanced in a POV manner.” Wikipedia

“As for the “duchy question” on the Cornwall article, you are also well aware that it is discussed on the talkpage. Your bnehaviour is exactly the sort of idiotic, unthinking nonsense that gets Cornish nationalism such a bad name amongst so many people (not least in Cornwall, where most people find the likes of you irrelevant irritants). You are doing more to undermine the movement for greater Cornish autonomy than the most rabid English nationalists ever will, simply because you make it impossible for anyone to take you seriously.” Wikipedia

“Deletion as MK aims are covered in the above, tweaked wording (Rights implies oppression of the Cornish people which is a fantasy of some” Wikipedia

“Total tosh as usual, the Cornish have no Celtic heritage to claim. They have no historical claim of a seperate history from England, most claimed ‘culteral history’ claim dates from a fictional history book and its claims in the 1920. This is just fiction claimed by a few Middle Class wombats with some wierd agenda that could lead to millions being wasted on fiction. There are many genuine claims could be made by other areas of Britain with a very genuine claim, the extremists in Cornwall have none!” The Guardian

“As a  London tax payer I would be delighted to kick the Celtic fringes into touch whether they wanted it or not.  I would be richer but it would not be right though.  All Celtic Nationalists parties would be well advised to pipe down in case the English took them at their word.” The Guardian

“I don’t mind them getting independence as long as they don’t hold me up at the border. If they make it difficult for us Londoners to spend long weekends in Cornwall their economy would collapse.” The Guardian

“Oh, do sod off. To suggest the Cornish are somehow a different ethnic people from the rest of England is absurd.” YouTube

“the Cornish are so ungrateful! who wouldn’t want to be part of the greatest, most culturally advanced country (England) in the world! why do you think so many immigrants come here for a better life?? if the Cornish want to be even less well off economically than they already are then let them have their independance! if it is offered to them they would not take it any way, these ‘freedom campaigners’ simply want something to whine about. how could a DUCHY hope to survive on its own with no industry???” YouTube

“I think the thing here is that Cornwall is quite an irrelevant place, with high unemployment and a fading fast economy. Nobody outside of Cornwall cares what happens to it. So, by all means argue the toss over what somebody said in an historical document 400 years ago. It’s not going to make a blind bit of difference. England owns you.” YouTube

“Cornwall is basically just a shit hole. It is the poorest county in England (yes, that’s right – ENGLAND!) and pretty soon people are going to get fed up with being ripped off by the inbred yokels that inhabit Cornwall along with the masses of retired folk from the rest of England.” YouTube

“an overwhelming bigmouth minority of Cornish people want independence backed by big muth evangelists and bigmouth IRA types and big mouth Alec Salmond types. But yet no fucker will vote for their right-wing political party why is this, I wonder?” YouTube

“Ha if cornwall became independent where would the money come from?…lol you live in cloud cookoo land…very small, irelevent,no money,little man sydrome…nearly as bad as the jocks…lol” YouTube

“Yes because a country could survive with Cornish pasties being the backbone of  it’s economy(!) Morons!!” The Sun

“One of the poorest counties in England wants to be cut free to run it’s own afairs, but still be subsidised by the rest of us I suppose. Cut the inbred pasty muching oafs adrift, and see how they survive.” The Guardian

“As along as they don’t want English taxpayers’ money they can do what they like. But, oh no they want that too. Bit like the “independence of most African countries: an illusion that lasts as long as it takes for the begging bowl to come out” The Independent

“Beautiful county populated with sullen indifferent inbreds.they’re looking forward to reviving their old ways,luring ships onto the rocks and drowning sailors.” The Independent

“I’ve only been to Cornwall a couple of times and I found it a wet, dismal dump with cloudy beer and horrible tourist traps, populated by whinging ginger dwarves speaking in an accent that makes the Welsh sound erudite. They eat minced dog and carrots wrapped in cardboard pastry and call it a ‘local delicacy’, which I suppose it is if the alternative is scrawny sheep?” Arrse

“Bearded pasty eating kuntards,,,,and that’s just the women.” dont-start-me-off

“I just don’t see why Cornwall would want to be independent. They’ve faced no genuine oppression, they don’t really have a separate culture, just pasties and a black and white flag. Yorkshire has more features unique from the rest of the UK than Cornwall, start going down that line and every county will want to be a country.” The Student Room

And finally, my personal favourite for its mind-boggling stupidity!

“Cornwall’s in England, granted it has a different history and language but its English so end of story.” YouTube

All in all, pretty sickening eh?

18 responses to “Who Do the Cornish Think They Are?

  • Roger Henley

    How good it is to see the cream of English intelligensia taking such a keen interest in Cornish affairs, and how eloquently they express their opinions. Why would any Cornish child want to be educated in a Cornish education system when this is the level they can aspire to by following the English one?

  • mark young

    Robert baillie you hate cornwall and the cornish so much and yet you spend so much time here wining like a little girl about how stupid we are then why are you working here if your so smart and we don’t work down here then maybe your more suited to a pencil pushing job somewhere in London cause that’s obviously harder work than manual labour in this county and be a man stand in any street of cornwall and shout out what you think of the Cornish see how long you last you narrow minded pile of shit

    • Daniel Sandford

      I’m not Cornish but I strongly agree with you, whoever wrote this article is either a troll or dumber than a retarded camel.
      Cornwall is just a part of England as any other but it has a uniqueness about it that should be embraced not hated by the likes of the author of this page who is clearly jealous.

    • A gardner

      I’m from Yorkshire. .been visiting cornwall for years..I prefer drinking in proper local pubs talking to real people rather than listening to arrogant more money than brains londoner in ill fitting wet suits .no more second homes.

  • Daniel Sandford

    The person who wrote that comment on the Daily Mail was obviously a retard, and I’m not even from Cornwall.

  • jinx

    Cornish bastards just want English money we should fuk em of now slimey twats

  • Roger

    Well that’s all your opinions. I’m a Londoner, but I think people are entitled to an identity. Maybe Cornwall/Kernow is geographically part of England, but don’t deny them of their unique heritage. If the county of Cornwall wants to become bilingual then why not, why would it affect you. Cornwall has long been established as one of the 8 celtic nations like Wales, Cornwall and Brittany (Brythonic branch), Ireland, West of Scotland, Isle of Man and Galicia in NW Spain (Goidelic branch) and a small region in the Po Valley in north Italy in Liguria speaking an italic language with celtic origin words. What Cornwall doesn’t have what we have is a decent football, rugby or cricket team!

  • Ray

    I love all the UK, warts and all, because the ‘and all’ far exceed the warts.

    However, if they want to make all the counties, along with Scotland, Wales,
    and Norther Ireland ‘independent’.I would want to be where I am in LONDON, that means ‘Greater London’.

    It is the only part that could survive, economically, in today’s world. And that will increase as times moves on. Just one proviso though, that the World Financial Centre stays. Without that, with, or without, any other parts, including Scotland, going independent, these islands would sink below the waves it once ruled.

    In the great depression, when Jon Dillinger was asked why he robbed banks, he replied -“Because that’s where the money is”. And the ‘square
    mile (City of London) is where the banks are, and the MONEY!.

  • Silly Bel

    After visting Englad 2 years ago I ended up staying in stevenage for a few weeks to visit family. I came to realise that stevenage was a very backwards place, nobody said hello when we walked down the street. The youth looked like people who clearly didnt want to acheieve anything in life and the whole place was just down right miserable. When we drove to cornwall it was like being in Ireland. Everybody was so happy friendly, nobody ignored us in the street. I even met a dear old welsh lady who had married a cornishman and was so helpful in helping me with my family tree and history. Give me Cornwall anyday, and I dont blame them stating that they are cornish not english as I wouldnt want to associate myself with those miserable lot either..

  • t. rogers

    If you truly dislike the Cornish, then dont go there to live. Just visit, try a pasty, enjoy a Cornish ice-cream or two, go for a paddle, then wander about like lost sheep,
    spend all your money, turn redder, turn around, then get back over the bridge to your german queen and your fucked up english ways; where you truly belong. REMEMBER you bastards are the invaders, we cornish didnt ask for you to turn up. We celts have little fondness for you really, or your ways. Sowsenek keun.

    • Bonzo

      Fact is without the rest of england subsidising your hordes of unemployed junkies on the sick that populate your every town you’d be worse of than eastern Ukraine in a week. Oh and talking of fucked up ways maybe you should beg your german prince to build a community centre or two to stop the highest rate of incest in the UK. As for all this ‘celtic’ bullshit there’s no such thing as Celtic. It’s merely a Roman word mean non Roman. Your not special your just an insignificant little backwater of bitter simpletons with a chip on both shoulders. ‘We didn’t ask you to come here’ er….. Maybe you want to look at all those adverts in every paper in the land begging us to come down and save you from living like 16th century peasants.

  • cathiep459

    Robert Baillie Your stupidity astounds me! You must be one of the most bigotted ignorant individuals to grace this Nation. The Cornish do not consider themselves English, though we are British. Please read the following and educate yourself before you spout your vile comments

    [S]tudies have found that the native Cornish population actually represent one of the most genetically “pure” groups in Britain. They have been found to possess a far higher degree of pre-Roman genetic history than those in other parts of England. In contrast, as you move beyond the Cornish border the DNA evidence reveals traces of Anglo-Saxon and Danish Viking heritage. As a consequence it’s recognised that the people of Cornwall are genetically different from those in the rest of England. They are in fact far more closely related to the native inhabitants of Wales than anywhere else. And together with the Welsh they comprise one of the most genetically distinct groups in the whole of Great Britain.

    So put that in your pipe and smoke it! Oh and by the way, whilst you may think we are here to ‘serve’ you you will probably find a large proportion of those ‘serving’ are not even Cornish. – we are in fact delighted to welcome anyone to visit our beautiful county so long as they go home after
    🙂 .

    • rob

      oh yeah – seems to me that a lot of people in cornwall are pathological liars – the amount of people I have met who have brothers in the SAS is astonishing or my dad used to be the king in waiting if cornwall became it’s own country – or plainly just being fucking SLOW – you are right the Cornish are distinct – they distinguish themselves as thick, always right, special and you know what they are SPECIAL!

  • rob

    it’s not the Cornish that are the problem – it’s all the fucking tossers from upcountry who come here and start their “landscape” gardening businesses, or metal collection, man and van, building firms etc – crikey there are literally thousands of them down here – they tend to have no education, running away from crimes they committed upcountry, come here to get a free house and have 40 kids and receive free medication and then walk around the place like they own it – I live in a town of about 5000 and every day over 100 of them come for their methadone, walk around town high and pissed, steal for the local shops and just make the place look untidy with their stupid low wear jeans and baseball caps and facial tattoos and piercings. Oh and also the bucket and spade brigade that come here on holidays – for fucks sake spend quality time with your kids not come here on the beach with your 8 kids, get pissed and then cause a ruckuss with your fat overweight partners in tow. it’s not difficult to make an effort and being poor is not an excuse to look like a TWAT!

  • Peter fairest


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